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Closing the Teach For America Blogging Gap
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Oct 05 2009

On Growing Up

Though this post has very little to do with teaching or my classroom, I think it has everything to do with what corps members (at least those coming straight out of college) experience.

I have more freedom now than I ever have before in my life.  Until now, my life has been fairly well laid-out–or, at least, there have been strict parameters on what I should (or should not) do.  In high school, there were clear expectations as to the classes that I should take, organizations I should participate in, and what I needed to do in order to prepare for college.  Where there was choice (should I take AP Physics or AP Chemistry?), there were easily numerable options.  In college, there were more options, but again, they were numerable–do I take statistics this semester or next?  Do I take Spanish or Italian to fulfill this credit?  Do I join this sorority or that one?  There was a finite set of majors from which to choose and organizations in which I could participate, and it was reasonably simple to narrow those down into things that would be of interest to me.  Even upon graduation, there were a few clearly preferable options–Teach for America, of course, being chief among them.

Now that the end of the two-year commitment is in sight, I am faced with the dilemma:  What do I do next?  Where do I go from here?  What now?!

So often, people say to me “You could do anything after Teach for America!” (or with such-and-such degree, or with your work ethic, et cetera ad nauseum).  That, I’m afraid, is exactly the problem!  There are now virtually no parameters on my future career/academic plans.  There is nothing that is clearly labeled the “right” choice.  I could do anything anywhere and for any length of time.  The deciding factor in choosing one path over another is, quite simply “because I want to.”

That is a VERY scary concept.  I am more free now than I have ever been before–I am untethered by romantic, familial, career, or academic obligations.  I’ve never been in a position to do whatever I wanted simply because I wanted to.

So for now, the loose plans are to keep teaching (but in a city that is more palatable than Houston), then go to grad school and perhaps become a guidance counselor.  I often feel like I make a better counselor than I do teacher, but I relish the teaching experience that I’m gaining now.

We’ll see.

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